There was an army barracks that had on its duty roster 4 soldiers to guard at all times a concrete slab in front of the barracks. The soldiers changed shifts guarding the slabs for many years. Different commanders came and went and the tradition continued.
After many years, a new commander was assigned to the barracks. Amongst the things he did was asking why things were done the way they were. When he asked why soldiers were guarding the slab, he was told, "We've always done it this way. It's our tradition. Our former commanders instructed us to do that."
The commander was adamant on finding out why. He went to the archives to look for answers and he came across a document that had the explanation. The document was very old. It had instructions written by one of the retired commanders who had even passed away.
The new commander learnt that over 80 years ago, the barracks wanted to build a platform where events could be performed. When the concrete slab was laid, wild animals walked over it at night before the slab would dry. The soldiers would fix it the next morning but when evening came the same thing would happen. So the commander ordered that 4 soldiers should guard the concrete slab for 3 weeks to allow it to dry. The following week the commander was transferred to another post and a new commander was brought in. The new commander found the routine and enforced it and every commander that came did the same. Eighty years later the barracks continued guarding a concrete slab.
What beliefs, attitudes, traditions have you carried on that were relevant to certain people or a certain time and they are still being carried out by you? Is your opinion about yourself, people of a different race, the opposite sex, certain business opportunities, new products etc obsolete? Question the status quo.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
There is beauty in life - if you look for it!
There is a famous saying: "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence." At times, human beings are not satisfied with what they have. People seem to do well until, unfortunately, they experience a loss. Then, usually, they want to be better - to experience the "green grass." It's human nature to always want to be better, to have more. Isn't that what is meant by the phrase "dream big?" At times, dreaming big might be great; however, at other times one should be thankful for what one has.
Consider the story of the 75 year old grandmother taking her 5 year old grandson, Matonya, to the beach for the first time. She was so excited. She bought Matonya a brand new complete outfit for his first time at the beach: new cap, new grey VEST,new swimsuit, new t-shirt, new shoes and a new sand bucket with a shovel.
They walked to the beach holding hands. As they got to the sand, Matonya said, "Grandma, because I can't swim I won't go near the water; so I'll just dig up the sand with my new shovel far from the sea."
However, Matonya had difficulty digging up the hard sand far from the water. Therefore, he said, "Shushu, this sand is too hard. Can I get close to the water where the sand is easier to dig?" Matonya quickly added, "But I promise I won't go in the water."
Hesitantly, the grandmother looked into Matonya's begging big eyes and said, "Okay, but promise you won't go in the water."
Matonya screamed with glee, "I promise." As he was close to the ocean he was having such a good time, digging and digging with ease in the soft sand. Unfortunately, a huge wave came on the shore and swallowed up little Matonya, taking him out to sea.
With her vigilant eyes, watching him from afar, his grandmother screamed, "Oh my God! Oh my God! Help me God!"
Just then, another huge wave thundered onto the beach from the ocean and "spit forth" little Matonya safely back on the shore.
Elated, the grandmother ran toward the boy and tightly hugged her 5 year old grandson. Wiping tears from her eyes she cried out as she looked toward the heavens, "Thank you God! Thank you so much!"
She then looked back down at her little sweet Matonya. She once again quickly looked back at the heavens and screamed, "Hey...Where's his new cap!?" Matonya was admiring his grey VEST.
Life is full of people who are not satisfied and not thankful for what they have. Many times people are constantly dwelling on what they have lost, rather than being satisfied and thankful for what they still have left. Be thankful for what you have, and set your goals for higher things." The world is full of many horrible things, as well as many wonderful things. Sometimes a person is constantly looking at the "horrible" things. However, my hopes are that they will be able to find the beauty in life. It's there - if you look for it!
Consider the story of the 75 year old grandmother taking her 5 year old grandson, Matonya, to the beach for the first time. She was so excited. She bought Matonya a brand new complete outfit for his first time at the beach: new cap, new grey VEST,new swimsuit, new t-shirt, new shoes and a new sand bucket with a shovel.
They walked to the beach holding hands. As they got to the sand, Matonya said, "Grandma, because I can't swim I won't go near the water; so I'll just dig up the sand with my new shovel far from the sea."
However, Matonya had difficulty digging up the hard sand far from the water. Therefore, he said, "Shushu, this sand is too hard. Can I get close to the water where the sand is easier to dig?" Matonya quickly added, "But I promise I won't go in the water."
Hesitantly, the grandmother looked into Matonya's begging big eyes and said, "Okay, but promise you won't go in the water."
Matonya screamed with glee, "I promise." As he was close to the ocean he was having such a good time, digging and digging with ease in the soft sand. Unfortunately, a huge wave came on the shore and swallowed up little Matonya, taking him out to sea.
With her vigilant eyes, watching him from afar, his grandmother screamed, "Oh my God! Oh my God! Help me God!"
Just then, another huge wave thundered onto the beach from the ocean and "spit forth" little Matonya safely back on the shore.
Elated, the grandmother ran toward the boy and tightly hugged her 5 year old grandson. Wiping tears from her eyes she cried out as she looked toward the heavens, "Thank you God! Thank you so much!"
She then looked back down at her little sweet Matonya. She once again quickly looked back at the heavens and screamed, "Hey...Where's his new cap!?" Matonya was admiring his grey VEST.
Life is full of people who are not satisfied and not thankful for what they have. Many times people are constantly dwelling on what they have lost, rather than being satisfied and thankful for what they still have left. Be thankful for what you have, and set your goals for higher things." The world is full of many horrible things, as well as many wonderful things. Sometimes a person is constantly looking at the "horrible" things. However, my hopes are that they will be able to find the beauty in life. It's there - if you look for it!
Saturday, June 11, 2011
East Africa Cup 2011, The road to Moshi begins.....
Its one week remaining to East Africa Cup 2011 kick off this year, young people all over East and Central Africa are energized about the “road to Moshi”. Participants from Zambia, Zimbabwe, Burundi, Southern Sudan, Uganda, Rwanda, Kenya and Host Tanzania are excited about participating in Africa largest youth sport and development event. From the 16th of June all roads will be leading to Moshi in Tanzania, not to climb striking Mt Kilimanjaro but to celebrate people who use sport in their community throughout the year.
To stress that East Africa cup is more than just sports, before the tournaments kicks off on the 22nd of June, leaders will be taking part in different trainings ranging from Kicking Aids Out from 17th to 20st focusing on potential leader level II, leader level II, and master trainers, 18th to 20th referees, 18th and 19th EACCES meeting (East Africa Cup Community Coach Education Systems), BBC world service trust will be delivering trainings on Journalism and media skills from 20th to 25th. Other training focusing on the participants will run concurrently with the tournament i.e. leadership, first aid and sports injuries, cartoon seminars, conflict resolution, HIV/AIDS, culture and coaching. Is this not unique approach!
Another milestone in this year’s event is the introduction of volley ball and sitting volley ball which will be additional to football and reflects EAC desire to connect more with many young people all over East Africa and the whole world.
On the 23rd ICES (International Community Coach Education Standards) webinar will be hosted by East Africa Cup aimed at exploring the role that competition plays in effective sport and development programmes and the implications for coach education in this field. The speakers on this webinar will address the question of whether promoting competitiveness and competition either supports of detracts from development goals.
This is just a tip of the ice berg, we have a lot happening in this year’s event, you just can’t afford to miss, but if you happen to, we shall be live on twitter, facebook, blog, and also different journalist from different media houses will be broadcasting live news.
We just cant wait….
Follow us on http://www.facebook.com/eastafricacup, http://twitter.com/#!/eastafricacup and http://www.eacup.org for more updates.
Friday, April 29, 2011
What does Love mean!
A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, "What does love mean?" The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all even when his hands got arthritis, too. That's Love."
Rebecca - age 8
When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."
Billy - age 4
"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."
Karl - age 5
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French Fries without making them give you any of theirs."
Chrissy - age 6
"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."
Terri - age 4
"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."
Danny - age 7
"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss."
Emily - age 8
"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate."
Nikka - age 6
"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, and then he wears it everyday."
Noelle - age 7
"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."
Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore."
Cindy - age 8
"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."
Clare - age 6
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."
Elaine-age 5
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."
Chris - age 7
"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day."
Mary Ann - age 4
"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her oldclothes and has to go out and buy new ones."
Lauren - age 4
"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you"
Karen - age 7
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross."
Mark - age 6
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget."
Jessica - age 8
And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. (Now this will melt your heart.) The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked him what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry."
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all even when his hands got arthritis, too. That's Love."
Rebecca - age 8
When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."
Billy - age 4
"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."
Karl - age 5
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French Fries without making them give you any of theirs."
Chrissy - age 6
"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."
Terri - age 4
"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."
Danny - age 7
"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss."
Emily - age 8
"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate."
Nikka - age 6
"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, and then he wears it everyday."
Noelle - age 7
"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."
Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore."
Cindy - age 8
"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."
Clare - age 6
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."
Elaine-age 5
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."
Chris - age 7
"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day."
Mary Ann - age 4
"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her oldclothes and has to go out and buy new ones."
Lauren - age 4
"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you"
Karen - age 7
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross."
Mark - age 6
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget."
Jessica - age 8
And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. (Now this will melt your heart.) The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked him what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry."
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Desire!
“I will not die an unlived life. I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire. I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me, to make me less afraid, more accessible, to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise. I choose to risk my significance; to live so that which came to me as a seed goes to the next as a blossom and that which came to me as a blossom, goes on as fruit.”
Saturday, April 9, 2011
LIVING IN OUR OWN SKIN (Peeling Back The Layers) - Miles Patrick Yohnke
"Society is a masked ball, where every one hides his real character, and reveals it by hiding." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
The poster boy. This is who I have been for most of my life with respect to the issues I'm about to address. Most humans are really just sleep walking through their lives. Society tells us that if we have this car, we are somehow better than another, that if we live in this type of home we are somehow better than another. If we have this type of clothes, again, we are somehow better. But the real story is that the woman or man is doing all this to be liked. I just bought this car. Do you like me now? I just bought this house. Do you like me now? I just bought this Hugo Boss suit, this outfit. Do you like me now? If we really think about it, we just want to be liked.
From the executive to the janitor we just want to be liked. We are all struggling! It makes one ask questions of who they like and why they like them. It should be the person inside. That something about them. It's not what their assets are, rather their asset is who they are.
Each of us, every person, has a wonderful story in them. Truly. We are all children of God. At times we just need to stop, reflect, and perhaps quit running from ourselves. It's interesting so many people are trying to find God. Many get involved in a religion only to jump to another. In a lot of cases they are not looking for God at all. Many are joining nothing dis-similar than a gym or a club per say. They just want to be around people that perhaps have a similar interest. Or mostly just to feel like they belong.
Most of our lives it is just that. We just want to belong! To be liked, needed, or be loved! We just need to be truly honest with ourselves and question our purpose in each thing we do. That God is in each of us, not something to go searching for, but searching within us. And in that lies the answer. Each of us holds a beautiful story only to be told. We are all capable of the most beautiful things.
The mind is a very powerful organ. Albert Einstein stated that we only use 10% of the brain. I was a young child when I read that. I thought it was a typo or just me dealing with my learning disorder. But I never forgot it and now years later, I understand. Most people don't want to think.
Thomas Edison wrote: "Five percent of the people think, 10 percent of the people think they think, and the other 85 percent would rather die than think."
We are conditioned in ways from media/society not to think. We are banged and banged over the head from ads and media to be this and that and not to think. Mother Teresa once said: "One of the greatest diseases is to be nobody to anybody."
We need to stop and take ownership of our lives. To realize and accept that happiness isn't in possessions. In us lies the happiness. When we realize this one has another type of life. A calm, a peace, a joy. A life that we never thought was possible.
The poster boy. This is who I have been for most of my life with respect to the issues I'm about to address. Most humans are really just sleep walking through their lives. Society tells us that if we have this car, we are somehow better than another, that if we live in this type of home we are somehow better than another. If we have this type of clothes, again, we are somehow better. But the real story is that the woman or man is doing all this to be liked. I just bought this car. Do you like me now? I just bought this house. Do you like me now? I just bought this Hugo Boss suit, this outfit. Do you like me now? If we really think about it, we just want to be liked.
From the executive to the janitor we just want to be liked. We are all struggling! It makes one ask questions of who they like and why they like them. It should be the person inside. That something about them. It's not what their assets are, rather their asset is who they are.
Each of us, every person, has a wonderful story in them. Truly. We are all children of God. At times we just need to stop, reflect, and perhaps quit running from ourselves. It's interesting so many people are trying to find God. Many get involved in a religion only to jump to another. In a lot of cases they are not looking for God at all. Many are joining nothing dis-similar than a gym or a club per say. They just want to be around people that perhaps have a similar interest. Or mostly just to feel like they belong.
Most of our lives it is just that. We just want to belong! To be liked, needed, or be loved! We just need to be truly honest with ourselves and question our purpose in each thing we do. That God is in each of us, not something to go searching for, but searching within us. And in that lies the answer. Each of us holds a beautiful story only to be told. We are all capable of the most beautiful things.
The mind is a very powerful organ. Albert Einstein stated that we only use 10% of the brain. I was a young child when I read that. I thought it was a typo or just me dealing with my learning disorder. But I never forgot it and now years later, I understand. Most people don't want to think.
Thomas Edison wrote: "Five percent of the people think, 10 percent of the people think they think, and the other 85 percent would rather die than think."
We are conditioned in ways from media/society not to think. We are banged and banged over the head from ads and media to be this and that and not to think. Mother Teresa once said: "One of the greatest diseases is to be nobody to anybody."
We need to stop and take ownership of our lives. To realize and accept that happiness isn't in possessions. In us lies the happiness. When we realize this one has another type of life. A calm, a peace, a joy. A life that we never thought was possible.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Are you inspired into Action!
You know something that I most enjoy and appreciate about knowing and living true to my life purpose? It's the ability to be inspired into action.
This morning I awoke around 5:30 and lay in bed for a while listening to Matatus hooting around the leafy suburbs of Urugits(If you not updated by the latest words in Nairobi, please refer to your Sheng dictionary, I mean friends). As I lay there, I noticed I felt odd - a filling leftover from a strange dream I'd had while sleeping. As I became more conscious of the sensation, I decided I didn't want to start my day in such a strange mood, so I continue to lie there but shifted my thoughts from the remnants of the dream to my life purpose.
As I recited my life purpose statement to myself, I began to notice my mood shifting as well. How could I be purposefully, passionately and playfully be of service today?, I asked myself, then recalled what I had on my calendar -- the wonderful young people that I work with at CHRISC, the different Projects that I'm working on, the new Community Coaching Program, excitement of EAC 2011, harusi ya Kariz(thought of how many pigs will lose their precious lives) leave plans, my future family, investments and not forgetting playing soccer games where am always the top scorer(I can see some people sneering but the truth must be told) etc Within a few minutes, I found I just couldn't stay in bed any longer. The opportunity to live on purpose was simply too compelling.
Once more I was inspired into action by my life and life purpose. Now, this isn't meant to sound like am full of myself, so please don't hear it that way. I just wanted to share it with you in case you don't find yourself pulled into your life by your dreams, goals and desires. I know it wasn't so many years ago that the main thing that had me get out of bed most mornings was the need to go pee. There just wasn't anything else going on with my life that was all that inspiring or compelling. But not anymore.
Living a life on purpose is amazing, and it all starts with readiness, willingness, and yes, a commitment to clarify your life purpose so that you can begin to live true to it. So, I ask you: What action could you take this week to become clearer about your life purpose? How will you inspire yourself into action?
This morning I awoke around 5:30 and lay in bed for a while listening to Matatus hooting around the leafy suburbs of Urugits(If you not updated by the latest words in Nairobi, please refer to your Sheng dictionary, I mean friends). As I lay there, I noticed I felt odd - a filling leftover from a strange dream I'd had while sleeping. As I became more conscious of the sensation, I decided I didn't want to start my day in such a strange mood, so I continue to lie there but shifted my thoughts from the remnants of the dream to my life purpose.
As I recited my life purpose statement to myself, I began to notice my mood shifting as well. How could I be purposefully, passionately and playfully be of service today?, I asked myself, then recalled what I had on my calendar -- the wonderful young people that I work with at CHRISC, the different Projects that I'm working on, the new Community Coaching Program, excitement of EAC 2011, harusi ya Kariz(thought of how many pigs will lose their precious lives) leave plans, my future family, investments and not forgetting playing soccer games where am always the top scorer(I can see some people sneering but the truth must be told) etc Within a few minutes, I found I just couldn't stay in bed any longer. The opportunity to live on purpose was simply too compelling.
Once more I was inspired into action by my life and life purpose. Now, this isn't meant to sound like am full of myself, so please don't hear it that way. I just wanted to share it with you in case you don't find yourself pulled into your life by your dreams, goals and desires. I know it wasn't so many years ago that the main thing that had me get out of bed most mornings was the need to go pee. There just wasn't anything else going on with my life that was all that inspiring or compelling. But not anymore.
Living a life on purpose is amazing, and it all starts with readiness, willingness, and yes, a commitment to clarify your life purpose so that you can begin to live true to it. So, I ask you: What action could you take this week to become clearer about your life purpose? How will you inspire yourself into action?
Monday, March 14, 2011
The value of Trust!
"It is better to suffer wrong than to do it, and happier to be sometimes cheated than not to trust.” – Samuel Johnson
I kept asking him for the documents and he would tell me he will bring them. Having failed to transact for over a year, I was a bit suspicious that he could have covered up the transaction and taken the money. And the more I asked for the documents without results, the more confident I became that there was something fishy in the whole scenario. So much so that at some point I just gave up on the issue and decided, as one friend of mine likes to put it, ‘kiorire ni kiorire’! That which is lost is LOST. The English would put it a bit differently: no need crying over spilt milk, pick up the pieces and move on.
The implications were obvious: NEVER AGAIN! My friends think am very trusting and here I was thinking that maybe I am. However I always trust people so much especially close friends/colleagues but some take advantage of this, after that it will be absolutely difficult to deal with me. Like this guy who conned me fair and square with a tall tale of how he had gotten a job to do and all he needed was a bit of cash to sort out the work then as soon as he was paid he would refund. A close friend I trust had referred him to me and so I did not question much. Only to realize much too late the fella just wanted money to pay his rent. Needless to say I have never recovered the money, but I have not seen the guy coming back to me to ask for ANYTHING. A relationship lost…
And so, as I debated with myself (something I find myself doing a lot lately … part of growing old, or is it?) as to how to deal with this guy who also happens to be "family", he called me and said he wanted to come over and see me so we can talk mundu hu mundu (man-to-man). I thought to myself, ‘finally the guy wants to confess to the fact that he used up my money’. And after failing twice, he eventually showed up at my door. Sure enough he had sold my stuff and used up the money. He had invested the money in a pyramid scheme with the hope of quick recovery and repayment, it all went down the drain. He had then resolved not to tell me until he had accumulated enough money to pay me, so thankfully, he had the money with him.
I was happy to see the money, I was sad to know that I could not quite trust him. I do not believe there is a halfway point with trust… you are either dependable or you are not. There is nothing like halfway dependable. And that is the challenge with trust… With money you can use up half and retain half. With love you could be half committal (unsure). With nearly all else, you may find a halfway point, but not with trust. And once you lose it, it is GONE! Fortunately, for most people, any time we meet a new person, we naturally give them the benefit of doubt, we trust them. Hence, there is no one who is disadvantaged in matters of trust. Each must own up to the fact that we are responsible for building or destroying trust. And in most cases, the cost of destroyed trust is a destroyed relationship. Is it worth it?
Life coach.
I kept asking him for the documents and he would tell me he will bring them. Having failed to transact for over a year, I was a bit suspicious that he could have covered up the transaction and taken the money. And the more I asked for the documents without results, the more confident I became that there was something fishy in the whole scenario. So much so that at some point I just gave up on the issue and decided, as one friend of mine likes to put it, ‘kiorire ni kiorire’! That which is lost is LOST. The English would put it a bit differently: no need crying over spilt milk, pick up the pieces and move on.
The implications were obvious: NEVER AGAIN! My friends think am very trusting and here I was thinking that maybe I am. However I always trust people so much especially close friends/colleagues but some take advantage of this, after that it will be absolutely difficult to deal with me. Like this guy who conned me fair and square with a tall tale of how he had gotten a job to do and all he needed was a bit of cash to sort out the work then as soon as he was paid he would refund. A close friend I trust had referred him to me and so I did not question much. Only to realize much too late the fella just wanted money to pay his rent. Needless to say I have never recovered the money, but I have not seen the guy coming back to me to ask for ANYTHING. A relationship lost…
And so, as I debated with myself (something I find myself doing a lot lately … part of growing old, or is it?) as to how to deal with this guy who also happens to be "family", he called me and said he wanted to come over and see me so we can talk mundu hu mundu (man-to-man). I thought to myself, ‘finally the guy wants to confess to the fact that he used up my money’. And after failing twice, he eventually showed up at my door. Sure enough he had sold my stuff and used up the money. He had invested the money in a pyramid scheme with the hope of quick recovery and repayment, it all went down the drain. He had then resolved not to tell me until he had accumulated enough money to pay me, so thankfully, he had the money with him.
I was happy to see the money, I was sad to know that I could not quite trust him. I do not believe there is a halfway point with trust… you are either dependable or you are not. There is nothing like halfway dependable. And that is the challenge with trust… With money you can use up half and retain half. With love you could be half committal (unsure). With nearly all else, you may find a halfway point, but not with trust. And once you lose it, it is GONE! Fortunately, for most people, any time we meet a new person, we naturally give them the benefit of doubt, we trust them. Hence, there is no one who is disadvantaged in matters of trust. Each must own up to the fact that we are responsible for building or destroying trust. And in most cases, the cost of destroyed trust is a destroyed relationship. Is it worth it?
Life coach.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Dont live like an Elephant!
Kenya wildlife service today released the results of elephants census in Tsavo national park, and the report says that we have 12,572 elephants. In Kenya elephants are purposely for tourist attraction while in India, elephants are used for manual labor. I choose the latter in this story. When an elephant is small and weighs approximately 100kgs, it is securely tied with a heavy-duty rope. In between 'jobs' the elephant tries to break through its limitation. The calf whines, tugs, and even tries to chew through the rope-but it is unable to break free.
Finally, the elephant gives up its will and accepts his circumstances. The elephant believes there is absolutely no chance to free himself and overcome his limitation. In doing so, he misses out on his defining moment.
A defining moment is the exact moment one adopts or accepts a new belief that drastically transforms their life. They accept this new belief as a new truth, regardless if it is true or not. Because the brain accepts repetition of thought and deduction as 'the truth,' the rope reigns sovereign not only in the calf's immediate environment, but in his mind as well.
With this belief deeply embedded in the elephant's mind, his handler came up with an ingenious idea to permanently disempower him. He realized all that was needed was to tie the four-ton animal up with extremely small ropes and he would remain tied. You see in the elephant's mind, any size rope would keep him securely confined.
Don't act like an elephant. Size up and break through the confining ropes in your mind. When you're faced with change, change your perspective. When you're overwhelmed with something new; change your view. Use affirmations, to eradicate limitations and nothing will be impossible for you.
Finally, the elephant gives up its will and accepts his circumstances. The elephant believes there is absolutely no chance to free himself and overcome his limitation. In doing so, he misses out on his defining moment.
A defining moment is the exact moment one adopts or accepts a new belief that drastically transforms their life. They accept this new belief as a new truth, regardless if it is true or not. Because the brain accepts repetition of thought and deduction as 'the truth,' the rope reigns sovereign not only in the calf's immediate environment, but in his mind as well.
With this belief deeply embedded in the elephant's mind, his handler came up with an ingenious idea to permanently disempower him. He realized all that was needed was to tie the four-ton animal up with extremely small ropes and he would remain tied. You see in the elephant's mind, any size rope would keep him securely confined.
Don't act like an elephant. Size up and break through the confining ropes in your mind. When you're faced with change, change your perspective. When you're overwhelmed with something new; change your view. Use affirmations, to eradicate limitations and nothing will be impossible for you.
Friday, January 28, 2011
DANCE LIKE NO ONE'S WATCHING
We convince ourselves that life
will be better after we get married,
have a baby, then another.
Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough
and we'll be more content when they are.
After that we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with, we will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage.
We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, when we retire. The truth is there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when?
Your life will always be filled with challenges. It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. One of my favorite quotes comes from Alfred D Souza.
He said, "For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin -real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life."
This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way, so, treasure every moment that you have. And treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time... and remember that time waits for no one.
So stop waiting until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you are off welfare, until the first or fifteenth, until your song comes on, until you've had a drink, until you've sobered up, until you die, until you are born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy... Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
So, work like you don't need money. Love like you've never been hurt and dance like no one's watching.
After that we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with, we will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage.
We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, when we retire. The truth is there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when?
Your life will always be filled with challenges. It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. One of my favorite quotes comes from Alfred D Souza.
He said, "For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin -real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life."
This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way, so, treasure every moment that you have. And treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time... and remember that time waits for no one.
So stop waiting until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you are off welfare, until the first or fifteenth, until your song comes on, until you've had a drink, until you've sobered up, until you die, until you are born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy... Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
So, work like you don't need money. Love like you've never been hurt and dance like no one's watching.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Lonely ember Story!
A member of a certain church, who previously had been attending services regularly, stopped going. After a few weeks, the pastor decided to visit him. It was a chilly evening. The pastor found the man at home alone, sitting before a blazing fire.
Guessing the reason for his pastor's visit, the man welcomed him, led him to a big chair near the fireplace and waited. The pastor made himself comfortable but said nothing. In the grave silence, he contemplated the play of the flames around the burning logs.
After some minutes, the pastor took the fire tongs, carefully picked up a brightly burning ember and placed it to one side of the hearth all alone. Then he sat back in his chair, still silent. The host watched all this in quiet fascination. As the one lone ember's flame diminished, there was a momentary glow and then its fire was no more. Soon it was cold and "dead as a doornail." Not a word had been spoken since the initial greeting.
Just before the pastor was ready to leave, he picked up the cold, dead ember and placed it back in the middle of the fire. Immediately it began to glow once more with the light and warmth of the burning coals around it. As the pastor reached the door to leave, his host said, "Thank you so much for your visit and especially for the fiery sermon. I shall be back in church next Sunday."
Guessing the reason for his pastor's visit, the man welcomed him, led him to a big chair near the fireplace and waited. The pastor made himself comfortable but said nothing. In the grave silence, he contemplated the play of the flames around the burning logs.
After some minutes, the pastor took the fire tongs, carefully picked up a brightly burning ember and placed it to one side of the hearth all alone. Then he sat back in his chair, still silent. The host watched all this in quiet fascination. As the one lone ember's flame diminished, there was a momentary glow and then its fire was no more. Soon it was cold and "dead as a doornail." Not a word had been spoken since the initial greeting.
Just before the pastor was ready to leave, he picked up the cold, dead ember and placed it back in the middle of the fire. Immediately it began to glow once more with the light and warmth of the burning coals around it. As the pastor reached the door to leave, his host said, "Thank you so much for your visit and especially for the fiery sermon. I shall be back in church next Sunday."
Monday, January 10, 2011
Creating opportunity!
An enterprising person is one who comes across a pile of scrap metal and sees the making of a wonderful sculpture. An enterprising person is one who drives through an old decrepit part of town and sees a new housing development. An enterprising person is one who sees opportunity in all areas of life.
To be enterprising is to keep your eyes open and your mind active. It's to be skilled enough, confident enough, creative enough and disciplined enough to seize opportunities that present themselves... regardless of the economy.
A person with an enterprising attitude says, "Find out what you can before action is taken." Do your homework. Do the research. Be prepared. Be resourceful. Do all you can in preparation of what's to come.
Enterprising people always see the future in the present. Enterprising people always find a way to take advantage of a situation, not be burdened by it. And enterprising people aren't lazy. They don't wait for opportunities to come to them, they go after the opportunities. Enterprise means always finding a way to keep yourself actively working toward your ambition.
Enterprise is two things. The first is creativity. You need creativity to see what's out there and to shape it to your advantage. You need creativity to look at the world a little differently. You need creativity to take a different approach, to be different.
What goes hand-in-hand with the creativity of enterprise is the second requirement: the courage to be creative. You need courage to see things differently, courage to go against the crowd, courage to take a different approach, courage to stand alone if you have to, courage to choose activity over inactivity.
And lastly, being enterprising doesn't just relate to the ability to make money. Being enterprising also means feeling good enough about yourself, having enough self worth to want to seek advantages and opportunities that will make a difference in your future. And by doing so you will increase your confidence, your courage, your creativity and your self-worth, your enterprising nature.
To be enterprising is to keep your eyes open and your mind active. It's to be skilled enough, confident enough, creative enough and disciplined enough to seize opportunities that present themselves... regardless of the economy.
A person with an enterprising attitude says, "Find out what you can before action is taken." Do your homework. Do the research. Be prepared. Be resourceful. Do all you can in preparation of what's to come.
Enterprising people always see the future in the present. Enterprising people always find a way to take advantage of a situation, not be burdened by it. And enterprising people aren't lazy. They don't wait for opportunities to come to them, they go after the opportunities. Enterprise means always finding a way to keep yourself actively working toward your ambition.
Enterprise is two things. The first is creativity. You need creativity to see what's out there and to shape it to your advantage. You need creativity to look at the world a little differently. You need creativity to take a different approach, to be different.
What goes hand-in-hand with the creativity of enterprise is the second requirement: the courage to be creative. You need courage to see things differently, courage to go against the crowd, courage to take a different approach, courage to stand alone if you have to, courage to choose activity over inactivity.
And lastly, being enterprising doesn't just relate to the ability to make money. Being enterprising also means feeling good enough about yourself, having enough self worth to want to seek advantages and opportunities that will make a difference in your future. And by doing so you will increase your confidence, your courage, your creativity and your self-worth, your enterprising nature.
Monday, January 3, 2011
New year recipe!
Take twelve whole months,
Clean them thoroughly of all bitterness, hate, and jealousy,
Make them just as fresh and clean as possible.
Now cut each month into twenty-eight, thirty, or
thirty-one different parts,
but don't make up the whole batch at once.
Prepare it one day at a time out of these ingredients.
Mix well into each day one part of faith,
one part of patience, one part of courage,
and one part of work.
Add to each day one part of hope,
faithfulness, generosity, and kindness.
Blend with one part prayer,
one part meditation, and one good deed.
Season the whole with a dash of good spirits,
a sprinkle of fun, a pinch of play,
and a cupful of good humor.
Pour all of this into a vessel of love.
Cook thoroughly over radiant joy,
garnish with a smile,
and serve with quietness, unselfishness,
and cheerfulness.
You're bound to have a Happy New Year.
Clean them thoroughly of all bitterness, hate, and jealousy,
Make them just as fresh and clean as possible.
Now cut each month into twenty-eight, thirty, or
thirty-one different parts,
but don't make up the whole batch at once.
Prepare it one day at a time out of these ingredients.
Mix well into each day one part of faith,
one part of patience, one part of courage,
and one part of work.
Add to each day one part of hope,
faithfulness, generosity, and kindness.
Blend with one part prayer,
one part meditation, and one good deed.
Season the whole with a dash of good spirits,
a sprinkle of fun, a pinch of play,
and a cupful of good humor.
Pour all of this into a vessel of love.
Cook thoroughly over radiant joy,
garnish with a smile,
and serve with quietness, unselfishness,
and cheerfulness.
You're bound to have a Happy New Year.
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